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Pages: query/poll-type thing [1]
Author Topic: Query/poll-type thing
papania

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2011-02-08 2-22-21-

query/poll-type thing night stands. bad PR for the gay community? or a legitimate way to let off steam/have fun? i ask here because it's the type of question i'm uncomfortable springing on my friends in person, as they might get weird, you're-hitting-on-me vibes.
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saver

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2011-02-10 6-48-15-

I don't see how a queer 1-night stand is any different from a straight - depends on how you handle it, I suppose (are you respectful, do you play safely, etc.) As far as it being bad PR? I don't know that it matters much. We could every of us live forever more as monogamous gay-marrieds - and many, many straight folks would still hate us. I think our society both celebrates and abhors those who are sexually adventurous, voracious, "slutty," etc. - regardless of who they fuck. Although I think we do garner more of the hate for being queer. Interesting question.
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scriven

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2011-02-11 23-38-05

well said. i sometimes feel i'm on PR-duty for the gay community. realizing this is something i should get over, i still can't manage to shake it completely. or perhaps i should try not to get acquainted with people if i suspect i'm going to be their lone gay friend, because that's where i feel this bizarre pressure to leave a good impression comes from. which truthfully has nothing to do with nighters. also, i needed a tactful way to brag about my weekend, so i thought i'd broach the topic. :D
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balboa

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2011-02-12 0-26-29-

was that your first night stand? If so, do you plan to make a habit of it? If so, do you feel it is an ego booster and something to be proud of? (Not that it is or is not, just wondering about how you view it.)
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  • leverich

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    2011-02-12 12-28-55

    not quite but it was the first in a while. shot like a bottle-rocket out of a year relationship, i landed at a club and took up with a stranger. this was in another town, since i feel like fooling around in the town where i live is a BAD idea. place is small, everyone knows everyone, would hurt somebody's feelings or complicate my own life. a habit? maybe. ego booster? absolutely. i think i just felt the need to go out and prove to myself that i could pick someone up if i wanted to. not to sound like an asshole about the whole thing. i don't have a problem as long as the other person understands we're in it for the same thing.
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    Gui

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    2011-02-15 3-40-30-

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    2011-04-06 23-44-16

    Is there a blinking light on your house that alerts the neighbors to your sexual escapades? I don't understand how this would have anything to do with "bad PR??" But then, maybe I'm slow.
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    2011-06-21 6-34-51-

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    2011-07-29 23-39-02

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    2011-09-16 1-06-43-

    heh heh....I wouldn't even bother with insulated
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    2011-11-11 22-32-34

    unscrew the bulb? i hadn't thought of that. what tools do i need?
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    2011-12-30 8-42-26-

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    deremer

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    2012-02-23 15-14-00

    I'm sorry... bad PR??? Your question really doesn't make any sense. It makes all sorts of assumptions... that there is a public relations initiative from this "gay community"...and why not "spring it" on your friends? If you can't talk to your friends about the weird questions in your head, who can you talk to? You might want to think about who your friends are...
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  • chai

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    2012-05-03 21-04-18

    for the most part they aren't people i'd have sex with, or really talk about sex with that much. so i thought i'd see what regular posters here think about night stands, because i'm curious about what currents of opinion there are among gay folks about this. so far, i like landonewts' take best.
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  • fielden

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    2012-08-02 22-42-46

    humans -- we're all HUMANS What difference does it make if someone is gay, hetero, bi... we're humans and many of us are sexual beings. And many people at some point or another in their lives may have a time-encounter. So WHAT??? I don't get this whole "gay community" thing as though there were a body of people in "this community" representing me and their PR people wouldn't like it if I said something opposed to their "PR campaign"...
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    swicegood

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    2012-08-03 10-06-18

    are you gay? if so there is a whole bunch of people out there representing you. They are activists who work for your rights. They are people in the public eye who bring a positive view of you. Then there are people like you who take that for granted and refuse to recognize that a community exists. No wonder nohits on you.
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    massett

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    2012-10-01 18-20-50

    yet another example of ad hominem Why must every comment be ad hominem? Why not simply discuss the issue at hand? I AM an activist, my dear. I fight for civil liberties. Why don't you stop making assumptions? The assertion that night-stands is "bad for PR" is absolutely repugnant and ridiculous.
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  • toland

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    2012-11-15 3-37-51-

    Well, you're on a list for queer women here... Of course, we are also all humans, but part of what draws us here to this fourm is the lure of talking with other queer gals. If being gay/les/queer isn't important to you, you might prefer the Romance Forum, or something less, I dunno, Gay.
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    terpstra

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    2013-01-01 1-45-16-

    and yet another ad hominem and assumption Of course its important to me - but its not all of who I am. And an individual's sexual proclivities are absolutely nobody else's business. Just as we wish for equal rights -- just as we argue that our sexual preferences are nobody's business -- so should it be crystal clear that its nobody's business if someone chooses to havenight stands.
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  • youman

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    2013-01-31 9-27-01-

    My sex life has ZERO to do with anyone's Public Relations strategy. I think it's a bizarre questions, to be frank. Your premise seems to be that a off sexual encounter is fundamentally wrong. I don't know many people who'd agree with that.
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  • sinor

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    2013-02-08 0-29-35-

    I think she mainly just wanted to announce that she'd had
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    2013-03-03 0-49-39-

    **nodding in agreement**
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    2013-06-15 17-03-25

    sexual proclivities are nobody else's business Just as we wish for equal rights -- just as we argue that our sexual preferences are nobody's business -- so should it be crystal clear that its nobody's business if someone chooses to havenight stands.
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